Finding Pockets of Joy in an Angry World

Silence your anxiety by noticing the wonder around you

Hello, Sensitive Friends!

Here’s an essay for anyone who cares about the state of the world, but also still needs to function.

As a child, the most often repeated feedback I received was that I was too sensitive. Nobody ever had any actionable advice on how I might become less sensitive. All those scolding adults wanted was for me to be quiet and learn to suppress the feelings that were always bubbling just under the surface.

I never did learn how to be less sensitive. As I close in on the half-century mark on this beautiful blue marble, I’ve finally begun to believe that being sensitive is more blessing than curse.

However, that doesn’t change the fact that this world is not made for sensitive types. We live in an angry world, full of bullies, energy vampires, and other dangers. Prophets of doom call down apocalypses, both real and imagined, all over social media.

Every corner of the internet makes a mockery of hope and works hard to monetize your outrage.

Is it any wonder that anxiety is at an all-time high in our society? To survive, you either adapt to accept the tyranny of fear, suppressing your feelings and dulling your senses, or you must develop some way to at least momentarily escape the loud, angry madness.

I choose not to accept a world ruled by the fear and anger of others. As Henry Miller wrote in The Colossus of Maroussi:

There is no salvation in becoming adapted to a world which is crazy.

That means the only option is to learn how to build your own emotional shelter from the storm.

Fortunately, you are already equipped to do that. You can find pockets of joy in each day to give you a reprieve from the fear and anger echoing from all of our screens.

We may live in an angry world, but we also live in a beautiful world of quiet, spectacular wonders. Humans and the rest of nature are capable of sublime displays of pure joy that you can bathe in, if you’re paying attention.

You must learn to notice what you notice. Our brains are pattern-recognition machines. The same mechanism that causes you to notice a newly-learned word everywhere, or to see the same model of car you just looked at last week on the road each day, can be used to find more joy.

You must train your brain to see wonder. Once you choose to look for wonder, you will see it everywhere. Even the most mundane day holds tiny pockets of joy.

You have the power to choose what you give your attention to. I’m not advocating for you to completely remove yourself from the world and live as a hermit on a mountain.

It’s critical for the health of democracy and our communities that you stay aware of what is happening. However, you do not need news alerts every half hour. Constantly fretting about the minute-by-minute outrages does not make you a better citizen. Instead, it cripples your ability for mindful engagement and thoughtful action.

Remember, the fear and outrage are the most easily monetizable emotions. Many influencers and media companies want to keep you disregulated, not as a way to prompt you to meaningful action, but as a way to keep you paralysed and profitable for them.

Give yourself, and those close to you, the gift of mindfulness. Take a break from the torrent of information and quietly notice what is happening around you.

Watch the sunset, look at the squirrels in the park, and smile at the children laughing in line at the ice cream truck.

Take your focus off your emotions and thoughts, and soak in some of the wonders happening around you.

Your life is too short to spend all of it angry and anxious.

I’ve found that just looking for wonder is not enough. I’ve developed a creative and spiritual practice to write a haiku about the wonders I see. It’s my way of cataloging the pockets of joy I find so that I can turn to them when the world feels especially harsh.

Spending a few moments in these pockets of joy gives me the strength to live in this world without having to dull my senses. It allows me to continue caring, without drowning in the world’s sorrows.

We cannot afford for you to give up or give in to the forces that want you either outraged or apathetic. If you want to change the world, you must have some way to see all that is good, not just all that is awful.

Lasting change is most often not made by those with the most intensity of feeling, but by those with the greatest persistence. Tyrants and oppressors of all kinds want you to get so angry that you burn out and drop out, so they can continue to amass power.

The simple act of noticing the moon during the daylight hours, or the whimsical way your neighbor’s dog has to circle a spot of lawn three times before peeing, allows your soul to rest. Wonder fuels your compassion and silences your anxiety.

Find pockets of joy in an angry world by paying attention to the small details of the world. Something as trivial as grass growing between the cracks of a city sidewalk offers you a chance to be grateful. That moment of attention to a small wonder will radically change the way you feel about the rest of your day.

What will you choose to do? Will you choose to adapt to a crazy world, or will you fight for a better future?

I hope you will stay sensitive. I hope you will refuse to give in to outrage or apathy. If you want to stay in the fight, you must learn to find pockets of joy in each day. Your sensitive soul needs moments to shelter, rest, and recharge.

Quiet joy in the face of tyranny is resistance. Noticing the wonders of the world allows you to persist in that resistance.

Be the weird you want to see in the world!

Cheers,

P.S. Did you know I’ve published five full-length books and three zines? My work is available in digital and physical formats here.