Living in the Real World
Creating your own reality
Hey, Mind Benders!
What world do you live in?
I wander between
conifers and the cosmos
discovering clues
Living in the Real World
It’s the start of the school year, which means I received another reminder from the middle school that my children have attended for the past seven years that they are trying to prepare my children to excel in the real world.
Ugh!
It’s hard to overstate how much I detest this framing. I cannot speak for other families, but our family very much lives in the real world. We deal with chronic illness, death, mental illness struggles, and late-stage capitalism regularly.
There’s also the idea that somehow school is not the real world. But considering many of the teachers and administrators have worked in education their entire careers, after graduating from school, do they even have any real-world experience?
I mostly keep these thoughts to myself, or this public newsletter. :) I truly love the middle school my children have attended (we only have one child still in that phase of life.) However, this school is far stricter than the high school and college my other children attend. Their policies around deadlines, timeliness, and attendance are far more punitive than any employer I’ve ever experienced or heard of.
However, the core reason I dislike the idea of preparing children for the real world, is that it assumes we all share a common reality. We do not.
To one degree or another, we all shape our own reality. We bring our prejudices, biases, and trauma into the world and create a reality bent around our experiences. The real trick to thriving in life isn’t adapting to other people’s rules and expectations, it’s learning to use your creative power to change your reality.
The reality our family has created for our middle schoolers is that they are expected to turn in their best work, and we all agree to not worry about the grade that work receives because middle school grades have no impact on their future.
While the school is working to prepare my child to work in a capitalist hellscape called “The Real World”, our family prepares our children to build their own reality.
Be the weird you want to see in the world!
Cheers,
Jason
Props to Dad & Mom
They show children the real world
Values start at home
I am still learning the proper haiku!
My kids went to school to get an education. They teachers were there to TEACH not to give their personal thoughts on “values”. That can be a slippery slope. What happens if they have a different opinion on what values than the parents do? Manners are fine but the “real world”? Kids can learn those things at home. Let them still be kids before they learn what it is like in “the real world”. Being strict rarely turns out the way they expect. After my dad passed away, mother became SUPER strict - it had the opposite effect in my life. Children learn far more from teachers who are good listeners, are kind, and who may be there for a child who has a hard time at home. Good luck - hopefully they don’t turn the kids into mini adults.
"Real world" sounds like a concept made up by the capitalist propaganda machine. Looks like your kiddos have good, sensible parents. Carry on!