Soft Cell Comes to the Rescue

What I know about beating writer's block

Apr 01, 2021

Personal Update

This week I’ve been lost in research for a project that I am previewing at the end of this newsletter. I’ve been reading travel memoirs because I’m creating a travel blog comic series about an intergalactic nomad.

Late one night, I realized the last three books I have read have all dealt with grief. This shocked me because I wasn’t moring over anything.

And then I started to cry big messy tears. Over the past decade, my family and I have been through some shit, and I’ve been trying to bulldoze my way forward.

It isn’t working.

I’ve lost a career, a business, and all of our money in the past ten years. Both of my parents have died. I’ve lost contact with all of my siblings. And, I’ve had cancer.

That’s just the highlights. There’s been a lot more.

I haven’t dealt with any of it.

I also realized that I started this Weirdo Poetry project, subconsciously, to use my art to heal myself.

Everything in today’s post is about my healing journey. I hope you will find something here that helps you too.

Don’t forget to read to the end of today’s newsletter to see the teaser for my forthcoming comic series. It will launch here in a special members-only post in two weeks.

Poetry

Visual Essay

Soft Cell Comes to the Rescue

My anxiety went off the charts, and I had a hard time keeping my copywriting business going. Once I got my anxiety back under control, I got sick with a mysterious illness that had me bed-bound and then hospitalized.

During that stay, I found out I had kidney cancer.

They caught the cancer early, but it was still a searing experience. Surgeons removed the tumor and 1/3 of my kidney.

It took me three months to physically recover from the surgery, but I never really recovered emotionally from the ordeal.

I kept working as a copywriter, wondering why I was still doing it.

Wasn’t cancer supposed to give you some kind of epiphany?

Six months out from my surgery and everything was the same. I still didn’t believe in writer’s block, and I was still an unhappy copywriter.

But the money was still pretty good.

Then the Universe sent me another signal.

A global pandemic. I lost all of my clients in March of last year.

I started to explore my creativity again.

I rediscovered creative writing and doodling.

I remembered that I loved cartoons and comics. I started writing a ton of haiku and other poetry:

My copywriting business rebounded, but now I had more creative energy. I was doing better work for my clients, and I was learning how to become a professional creative on the side.

I’m now almost two years out from my cancer surgery and in a different world. I now consider myself an artist. I have chosen to be an indie comic creator. I combine poetry, weird stories, and abstract doodles into comic strips and visual essays. This is my vocation. Copywriting is just my day job.

Today, facing a self-imposed deadline, I sat down at my desk, looked for a playlist of music I know and love, and started writing whatever came into my mind.