22 Comments
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juliep's avatar

This is a really good piece, Jason. Hits home.

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Jason McBride's avatar

Thanks, Julie!

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Cindy O’Dell's avatar

I like the way you differentiate between regret and shame because sometimes it’s too easy to easy to slip from the first to the second, stopping all progress. And I love the last haiku and art. Reading this was definitely worth it!

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Jason McBride's avatar

Thank you, Cindy! That last haiku has become kind of a mantra for me at the end of the day.

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Liz Gauffreau's avatar

A very insightful reflection. I can’t imagine not having regrets.

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Jason McBride's avatar

Right? I feel it's the most toxic trait to claim you have never made. mistake or have a regret.

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Ann Collins's avatar

Most of the time we’re doing what seems to be the right thing in the moment. I think regret comes when we gain insight, and realize maybe we could’ve acted differently. I hope you’re kind and gentle with yourself about those memories. All we can try to do is start over— every day is a new chance.

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Jason McBride's avatar

For sure, every day is a blank slate

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Sue Cauhape's avatar

Even at 75, I think about all the many stupid things I did. I don't know yet if these "nightmares" I have in the night re regrets or shame. If I can't amend the situation after all these years, is it shame. I certainly regret what I've done. And the 'victim' has probably forgotten both that incident and me. Guilt is a nasty, toxic thing, Jason.

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Jason McBride's avatar

Guilt is so corrosive, especially when weaponized by authority figures. The regrets I'm talking about are a different species. Less something to repent over and more something to do differently next time.

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Sue Cauhape's avatar

These things I was talking about are little "sins." The tiny ooopses and "did I really say that" episodes of everyday life that make a person cringe. Little signals of where to improve one's behavior. It's a constant thing, though, when you're as clueless as I am.

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Pamela's avatar

Once again your timing is impeccable! I needed to read this - today! Thank you Jason ❤️

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Jason McBride's avatar

Thanks, Pamela! I believe there's a synchronicity that connects us all, if we just tune into it.

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Pamela's avatar

Agree 100%

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Writer Pilgrim by So Elite's avatar

Powerful stuff... personal and hits home. Those shy kids are shy for a reason. No regrets please it's all a learning curve and cure. Wonderful art as always! I find regrets, in my understanding to be very limiting and stopping me from breathing. I feel I should write a poem about it. This has inspired me. If I go deep into thinking of regrets it gets debilitating. There's a reason always right? Love this post.

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Jason McBride's avatar

Thanks, I hope you do write that poem!

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Monique Hutchinson's avatar

Regrets will be there, what's important is that you don't let them anchor you to the past. We must recognize that the past can't be changed - it's that which lets us live freely.

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Jason McBride's avatar

I agree that we cannot be consumed with regret, but I do think we need to bring a little of our past with us to make the most of the current moment.

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Toby Neal's avatar

You nailed this one, dear friend!

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Jason McBride's avatar

Thank you! It boggles my mind how so many grown-ups (mostly men, frankly) love to claim they can't think of a single mistake or regret from their life.

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Kali's avatar

That was beautiful!

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Jason McBride's avatar

Thanks so much, Kali!

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